baby boy, equality, gay adoption, gay family, gay rights, lesbian, lesbian family, lesbian moms, second parent adoption, State adoption laws, Uncategorized

The Big Day

I’m a little late posting the update from our Adoption Day but wanted to share a few pictures from our special day!

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August 6th started with our whole family loading up and heading to downtown to the courthouse in Nashville. Noah was in a great mood and good thing because it was a long day.

Everyone in Davidson county doing an adoption for the month of August is told to be there that day. There were about 12 cases on the docket. Because adoptions aren’t public each family has to go in one at a time and they don’t post the order you will be going. So you really have no idea when you’ll be called. So we did our best to entertain Noah and keep him happy.

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We were lucky enough to have one amazing attorney! Her name was Erica Johnson and she happens to be one of our closest friends. We were her first official adoption case. So this was a BIG day for her too. We have been close friends with her and her partner Jen for years. It made it so special for us to be able to have her represent us during this process. She did an amazing job and we can’t say thank you enough!

After almost a 2 hour wait we were finally called! It was our turn. We all filed into the courtroom. We stood in front of the judge and Erica took turns asking Leslie and I a few questions. Then the judge said the words that we had been waiting to hear…”I find that it is in the best interest of this child, Noah Harrison, to be adopted by these two.” It was such an amazing feeling! Then he asked if we would like to take a few pictures! We all gathered around his desk for a little photo opp!

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He was such a nice guy. Even asked for us to send copies of the pictures we took to his office. Noah received his first sucker from the judge and was more fascinated with that than anything else.

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It was a long day and you could tell that Noah was exhausted when we were leaving but I was so proud of how he acted. No crying or screaming. It was a perfect day.  Oh and not to forget it was also Leslie’s birthday!

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We celebrated Leslie’s Birthday that night with a few of our closest friends. I successfully surprised her for the first time! Told her none of our friends were available to hang out. Told her I forgot to get a cake. And didn’t have time to get her a gift. But little did she know…I was able to get everyone together to surprise her and topped it off with a strawberry cake with buttercream icing for her. : ) I was so happy that she was surprised! Such a great day!

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equality, gay family, gay rights, lesbian, lesbian moms, lesbians, lesbians ttc, LGBT, rainbow family\, supportive, Uncategorized

Throwing Stones at Our Own

I came across a post on the Curve Magazine Facebook page of a young couple holding a fundraiser to help them pay for their baby making process. This is a young couple that lives in Denver, CO and from what I gathered they are photographers. They are offering “perks” for donations and are trying to raise $6,500. I smiled when I saw this thinking to myself…”This is pretty clever. We should have thought of a fundraiser!” Then I started slowly scrolling through the comments and was shocked and saddened by what I read… “If they want a baby shouldn’t they be able to afford one on their own? Just my opinion”, “Wait till you have to pay childcare, ladies. If you can’t afford a baby now, the cost of raising one is really going to shock you.”, “If you can’t afford to make it you probably can’t afford to support it.”, “I find this to be an odd way to have a child….children are expensive if you can’t afford to produce one how can you afford to raise one?”, “even though I already commented I just had to come back to say that NO ONE should give money to this..stop the madness!!!”… Now, I remind you that these are all other lesbians. So just because this couple decided to seek help in raising the money for their attempts we should assume that they can’t afford to raise a child or deserve one?!? Wow! What is wrong with our community AND When did we become so hateful to each other? Is it just me or do you not feel that we as lesbians need to be supportive of each other in our efforts to start families. Now of course I don’t expect everyone to donate money to their cause but at least support the fact that a loving couple is excited to start their own family and wish them well. These people with the negative comments are acting like because they are holding this fundraiser that they are saying they can’t afford a child. They’re NOT asking for help in raising their child, they’re simply creating a fundraiser to help with their attempts to get pregnant. I’ve known more than one straight couple that has held a fundraiser to help with the expenses of adoption and no one throws stones at them. No one assumes that they don’t have the money to pay for the child once its theirs. Why are we throwing stones at our own?

Raising a baby is not ALL about money. Yes, children cost money (I know. I have two of them.) but they aren’t as crazy expensive as everyone’s comments are making them out to be. You can find ways to save money and afford the essentials. Most of all a baby needs love, attention, stability and I’m sure this couple can handle that.

We have a whole new generation of LGBT who see that we deserve to have families just like straight couples! Twenty years ago most gay and lesbian couples never even thought of trying to have children…now its 2013 and we live in a whole new world of access and availability to try to start families. Straight couples can get pregnant without a penny spent. They have an unlimited supply of sperm and can try whenever they want to. And I would dare say that many of them aren’t financially prepared. I would like to see how many capable straight couples would be getting pregnant if they had to come up with $1000 a month to try!

I am so disappointed in the reactions that these girls received. Most of you know how costly it is to make a baby in our world. Most of you saved up for months and maybe years to do so. I know Les and I had to stop trying at one point because we ran out of money. What is so wrong with this couple just asking for help?!? If a stranger wants and can afford to donate to their cause then good for them! Some may think it’s odd or weird but who cares! Don’t give if you don’t want to give. Scroll past if you don’t support them but why send out these nasty messages to them. What ever happened to…”If you can’t say something nice then don’t say anything at all.” ?

We live in a world with so much hate directed at the LGBT community. We are battling daily for equality. We long for the day that our marriages are recognized and we are seen as equal. We want to put a stop to the hate that we face but yet we are turning on our own people!

“You must BE the change that you want to see in the World!”- Gandhi

Here is a link to Jennie and Heather’s Fundraiser if you’d like to take a peek… http://igg.me/at/babycrate/x/2660086