The search begins!!!

So straight couples have it easy once again…they can’t change the way the person they fell in love with looks…so therefore they have no choice but to have babies that look like themselves. Now for the lesbian couples who have decided to have a baby they have the luxury of choosing the father and his appearance. This is your one chance to be very picky and choose someone who is super hot or super smart. How many people can say that they hand selected their “baby daddy”? So SCORE…advantage the lesbians on this one!

I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that one of the first things Leslie and I said to each other is that we really didn’t want to have an ugly kid. Saying something like that out loud just makes us feel bad. But we all know that being attractive has never hurt anyone. Would you wish for an ugly child? Of course not. So why not try to pick someone who is attractive…I know that Leslie and I can provide an excellent education for our child so lets just concentrate on giving them the advantage of being attractive first.

Its an odd feeling to do an advanced search for a guy that you have no intention of dating but you plan to hopefully have his baby one day. Where do you start? Well you have several options to choose from in order to narrow down your search. You can choose the basics: Race, Hair color, Eye color, Height and Weight. Then if you want to get more detailed than that you can choose ethnic background, religion, blood type and if they want to be an identity disclosure donor or not. One of factors that Leslie and I didn’t take into consideration in the beginning was the donor we chose being an Identity Disclosure (ID) Donor or not. For those who aren’t familiar with this I’ll fill you in on what Identity Disclosure means. It means that the donor is willing to be contacted by  his biological offspring once they have reached a certain age ( 18 i think). Now this may not seem like a huge decision to most but I believe that it is one of the most important decisions in the whole donor choosing process. Deciding if your donor has to be ID or not is a big factor in how many donors you will have to choose from and the units of sperm from an ID donor will cost you more than a non ID unit. We both felt like that our future child/children should have the option to one day meet the man who is their biological father if they wished for that. I couldn’t imagine telling my kids that I had the option to pay a little extra money to allow them the right to do that but decided that it wasn’t worth it. We know that we will always be their parents and that if they meet this guy or not, he will not become more significant than us to them so why not give them the option to decide for themselves.

So you narrow down your search as little or as much and you want to then the Search Begins! You have ??? number of donors show up on your list that meet your criteria and you begin to sort through these guys. Some are so cute and others are not so cute….Some have lots of pictures and some have just one. Can I say how helpful it can be to see what the guy looked like growing up! It’s just nice to get an idea of what to expect! You can read about their medical history and their families as well. You are trying to get a glimpse into what this guy must be like and if he is worthy of being the biological father of our kid. So many choices….so much pressure….are you sure that we are picking the right one??? Talk about a tough decision that will affect you forever…well this is it.

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